TRUST…*deep sigh*…I know I’m in for some good long writing…And err, as much as I’m a guy…*doing the balls test* LOL…I’ll try to be very unbiased and sit on the fence…I’m neither male or female on this one.
So, let’s go…TRUST…hmmmmm…almost, if not more important than LOVE itself in a relationship…So ladies, it’s come to my knowledge…(from years of long, hard study and research) that many, err sorry, most, I mean practically all of you don’t trust your men…*sad face* Wait! Did I just do a sad face? Oops! I’m supposed to be neutral here…LOL, and hey! When I type “LOL” I’m really laughing…just for the record…laughing and punching my keyboard hard.
I’m getting so distracted here…coz I’m excited this morning…why? I really don’t know…woke up on the right side of my bed…which by the way has TWO right sides…hehehehe…Focus Adotekom, Focus!!
Now back to the issue at hand…why is there so much lack of trust in relationships these days? Your man’s like…”Baby, I’m still at the office, so much work today…” You reply…”Ok boo, don’t stress yourself too much ok?”…Now that’s an ‘I-TRUST-YOU-WITH-ALL-MY-HEART’ reply, but what’s really racing through your mind are pictures of your man on top of his female colleague on the office desk…*shaking my head*
Many of you see every other woman in your man’s life as a threat…And when I say every other woman I mean his colleagues, classmates, schoolmates, old time friends…in short any acquaintance in his life that doesn’t resemble a man. I have close friends whose ladies monitor their text messages, emails, Blackberrys..abi na Blackberries…phonecalls, twitter and facebook accounts…Geez! Where’s a man supposed to go for some breathing space? You check through his phones, shirt pockets, laptop, ipad…in short anything that he keeps information in…Just for a sniff, the slightest hint or evidence that there’s a mistress out there.
If some ladies had their way, they’d personally be in charge of picking up all their guy’s phone calls…*I might need a bodyguard after this*… In all my past relationships…(and hey! they ain’t that many), for those of you who want to imagine me as one Hugh Hefner, hold it there o…Did I sound guilty for a minute? *adjusting my halo*
So, I was saying…in all my past relationships, I have been asked this question soooo many times…”WHO IS SHE??!”…Just because I waved, greeted, or chatted briefly with another lady…even if it’s through the phone. Immediately the interrogation begins…I come face to face with the Russian KGB itself— practically, until I can prove beyond every reasonable doubt that I have no strings attached…strings too strong sef, that I have no thread attached to the lady.
I honestly don’t blame ladies, for we live in a cold world out there(grab your warm clothing)…full of man-eaters, sorry, man-snatchers and guys who profess their undying love to a woman yet flirt and sleep with others out there…*sad face*
For some of the ladies, they probably don’t have the strength…physical or psychological, to do all that “Sherlock Holmes” style snooping and probing for proof and evidence. But deep inside, lingers doubt and fear…about their man’s faithfulness…I don’t know which is worse…to let it out or let it eat you inside? I’ve heard many ladies say: “As far I’m concerned, I’ll just assume he’s cheating, so when I find out, I won’t be too heartbroken”…Some ladies say…”I know he’s cheating, as long as he does it respectfully I don’t mind” (mind you she hasn’t caught him yet)…And seriously??!! Respectful cheating? Cheating is already disrespect!
Ladies, when we hang out with the boys…(I know y’all can’t stand that!), it doesn’t mean we have ladies sitting on our laps planting kisses on our necks. Those female friends we have..are just friends! (This isn’t a universal conclusion), mind you! But I mean, we’ve known many of them long before we met you. Like for me, I have more female than male friends…that’s just the way it’s panned out. My point is, there’s absolutely no sense in being in a relationship with someone you can’t, or don’t trust…Its like investing all your money in a bank you feel might collapse anyday…It simply isn’t worth it…If he’s worth dating, he is worth the benefit of the doubt.
And that’s why many ladies are in abusive relationships…Physical and emotional abuse because the guy’s always scared, intimidated or outright jealous when he sees his woman within a hundred metres of another man…
In a guy’s defense though, you can’t blame us for getting a little jealous when we hear or see y’all getting comfy with another guy….even if he’s a harmless friend *clearing my throat*…It’s natural. Love comes with many packages, and one of them is jealousy. Don’t get mad if our mood changes right after you’ve just had a two-minute laugh-and-chat with a friend you bumped into while we’re on a date.
We can’t help but get a ‘little’ defensive and ask necessary questions when other guys (who we beat to the finish line) *winks* are offering you gifts, calling and sending all kinds of romantic stuff…(in our eyes, sending you all kinds of c@%^*! LOL
Ladies, our sweet, beautiful ladies…it’s not you we don’t trust…It’s the men…the smooth talkers trying to use their charm, money and gifts (sometimes we can’t afford those things sef…lmao!) to try and lure you away from home…And home here means US! Your knights in shining armour…(hey, where’s my helmet?).
Many relationships these days are a joke…with so much cheating happening on both sides…But if your relationship is special, and the person means everything to you…Then I think the least you can do, is give that person some trust. Trust gives your man or woman confidence…to keep on loving you, with ease and peace of mind. No trust in a relationship is like a house without a roof…You’ll feel the heat and the rain…and of course…it comes with pain…(omg!!! I rhymed! I rhymed!) *wiping tears of joy*
You get my point though…If you’re in love, remember, love is a risk…So give it to someone who’s worth the investment…Love has a price, and the greatest of them is…TRUST!
Wish you all a HAPPY EVER AFTER! (yup, I believe in fairy tales)…hope y’all end up like the peeps in this pic! *winks*
Please don’t ever let past hurts and heartbreaks prevent you from enjoying your new relationships…You didn’t get it right before doesn’t mean you’ll never get it right…
Thanks for reading this piece…I appreciate it…I’m off to have lunch with Cupid…